I was going to write that post sooner or later, Goddess. Not.

Improper Singlish. That's almost ironic because Singlish was never proper. But whatever. Goddess addressed the language, grammar, sentence structure, choice of words, etc.

I'm gonna talk about spelling. I'm more anal about it.

Ok. So in Singlish, we all know us Singaporeans like to add stuff at the back of our sentences, like 'lah', 'lor', 'leh' and 'hor' are only some of the examples. Keep that thought for a minute while I go through the purpose of chatting shortforms like 'bb', 'thx' and 'lol'.

So why were the shortforms created and what were they intended for? Well obviously for humanity's favourite activity: save time. Now think about that too and put these two points together.

Now my point is here. There's shortened spellings of 'lor' and 'lah' for example. They would be 'lo' and 'la' respectively. And a different spelling for 'lor' would be 'loh'.

And that's okay, because it's shortened and has a purpose. So now we look at this new phenomenon among brainless people. It's a new way of typing. So let's take 'lor' again. These idiots would type like this:

lorrhss

What in the fucking hell is that? If you actually try and pronounce it (try it now), you either sound like you have a lisp and you're trying to say 'loathe', or you happen to be a talking serpent.

You add extra letters to save time... I mean, waste time! Are all of you out of your freaking minds? I mean, something two hundred letters long can easily become doubled with this technique.

Let's look at the most asurd example I have come across. This is the spelling for 'ok':

okokiesxz

You have just made a word longer while making yourself sound like a snake, at the same time. Isn't that simply amazing? Most people settle for a lone 'k'. Maybe they thought the letters were lonely so they added more to keep them company or something.

Like alphabetical social escorts.

The way people type these days? I'm only grateful it's not that common yet. And I hope it'll never be. Because reading it could get you freaking murdered.

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